A SELFLESS LOVE...

Words cannot fully describe how much I have been in awe of and humbled by the selfless love I have experienced during my time of working with birth mothers who have made an adoption plan for their child. However, I want to try to give you a glimpse from the hearts of these precious women who choose the loving plan of adoption for their child.

Let me first say that there are many birth fathers who I have personally worked with who love their child immensely, and they choose that adoption is the best plan for their child as well. Most of my experience, though, has been supporting women throughout their pregnancy and helping them to make a plan for their child's future. Therefore, I will focus on a birth mother's perspective of making an adoption plan.

..."I want the best for my child"

..."I can't give her what she needs right now"

..."I don't want him to have to want for all things always in life"

..."I love her so much that I want her to have a mom and a dad...a stable home"

..."I want her to grow up in a Christian environment"

..."I want him to have an opportunity for the future"

..."I want her to have the best life possible"

..."This plan will benefit my child the most"

..."I don't want her to have to go without"

..."I don't want him to have to worry about anything"

..."I don't want her to have to suffer because of my life circumstances right now"

..."I want him to know that I love him so much....that is why I am making this plan..."

Notice that all of those statements were ultimately about the child and not the person saying them. Those comments are a few examples of what I hear from expectant mothers looking at making an adoption plan for their child. In the midst of their tears, grief, and heartache of leaving the hospital without their baby in their arms and the thought of living life without seeing that child daily---they still put their child above how they are feeling, and they choose what they believe will provide the best possible future for their child. Is that not what a wonderful mother does??...puts her child's needs above her own needs, wants, and desires. AMAZING love!!

Please know that women who make an adoption plan for their child genuinely care for their child and they truly love their child more than we can ever imagine or know. These children are not unwanted or unloved. Most birth parents would desire to parent their child if their circumstances were different. They could not make this plan for their child unless they loved their child. Not only did they choose life for the child, but they also are choosing what they decide is the best plan for the child's future. Sometimes that "best" plan is parenting, but other times they decide that the best plan is placing them in a forever, loving adoptive family.

It takes an incredible amount of courage for these women to make this selfless decision for their child. An adoption plan is made out of love. We pray that our child will always know, feel, and believe in the love of their birth mother.